I must be out of my mind....

Well, it only took 2 weeks but I am finally packed. Now that I am, the reality of the situation has hit me (like a ton of bricks!) Tomorrow morning I am getting on a plane with my two girls and no help... Yup, flying cross country alone, with both girls.... All by myself... Solo... Just me... I had no anxiety about flying alone with Grace, hell, we flew solo cross country about every other month for the first year plus of her life. But somehow, this is a bit scary. I am actually more worked up about how to get 2 girls, 2 car seats and an over sized diaper bag on the plane alone. I am not worried about getting it all through security (though it will be no picnic) and I am not worried about how they will act/behave on the flight, nope... just how am I going to get us all on board, and buckled in. Everyone says... oh you will just ask the flight attendants for help... Uh, yeah, remember I was a Flight Attendant for 5 years.... We HATED when single mothers couldn't handle their brood and all the crap they lugged aboard with them! We were rude, yup outright rude to these poor mothers.... plus, to be honest, there is a TON of stuff, FAA required stuff that Flight Attendants need to be doing before and during the boarding process, their job is not to help me out (no matter what the uninformed flying public believes, it is not their job to help me) ... and knowing how tough and demanding and thankless a job it is.... I am not sure I have the guts to ask for help.

I am however very excited to see family and intorduce and reintroudce Lily. I know how excited all the grandparents (and great grandparents) are to see us... So, I hope to get a good nights sleep and will let you know how it all turns out... cross your fingers and hold your breath, this could be a bumpy ride!